Hi Ashley,

Thanks for sharing a bit about your situation. I’ll pass your message on to one of our career coaches but in the meantime would like to respond to some of the concerns you mentioned.

I see you referencing a lot of “what ifs”. What if your capacities are not what they once were? What if you can’t meet their standards? What if the cancer comes back? What if you need time off?

These are all completely valid and understandable fears based on what you’ve been through and the many unknowns associated with a cancer diagnosis and treatment. With that said, life can’t be lived within the scope of what ifs, because no one would ever do anything. That’s not to say there shouldn’t be some measure of safety and security involved in decision making, but risks are not always a bad thing!

Understandably, a risk such as taking a new job and leaving one you are familiar with can be scary. You don’t know what to expect and thus focus all of your energy wondering if it’s the wrong decision. But, what if it is the right decision? You mentioned that you’d already decided to leave your current company due to the impact it was having on your health and stress levels. Keeping that in mind, making a switch to what you refer to as your “dream job” at a company that you’ve confirmed treats their employees well, isn’t the same kind of risk as going into somewhere completely blind because you needed to get out of the situation you are in.

The choice is, of course, yours and yours alone to make and it sounds like you are taking into consideration all of the practical elements of such a decision. Right now it’s about assessing the fears you have and determining if they are really as probable as they feel right now. In our article on Your Mindset after cancer, you’ll find reference to being ‘realistically optimistic’, which it sounds like you’re close to! It’s really about being hopeful and positive (for example, you were contacted by this recruiter for this job, at this time, for a reason!) and then taking into account some of the aspects that deserve consideration as you make final decisions.

Overall, it seems like though the decision feels weighty, you have a sense of what your needs are on a professional and personal level, and once you’re able to work through some of the concerns you have on a realistic level, you can feel confident in whatever decision you make.

If you have more questions or would like more CAC resources, please feel free to email us at cancerandcareers@cew.org.

Warm regards,

Nicole Jarvis, LMSW

Assistant Director of Programs

Cancer and Careers

Hi, Ashley,

Heading into the unknown is always a challenge, and often scary. I understand you have questions about your future. After receiving a cancer diagnosis and all that it entails, it is easy to lose that sense of confidence and the feeling that you know how to successfully navigate in the world. I get it, but I also want to remind you that cancer may have shaken your confidence but it did not take away your skills and experience. You may be living in a new normal, but you DO know what it takes to succeed in your career field and CAN still make strong contributions.

A few comments to supplement what Nicole stated:

All of us feel a bit of trepedation when striking out after a period of inactivity. It may take you a few weeks to get back into the rhythm of working again. Start now to establish a work-like schedule of getting up at the same time, getting ready for your day in the same way and focusing on challenging mental tasks a little bit more every day. Just knowing that you have made it to the final rounds of interviews is indication to me that your mental sharpness is something you can rely on. Future employers usually don't move someone through to that level unless they believe you can do the job and make a positive contribution to their team.

Taking on a new career role and the stretch it entails challenges most of us, whether cancer survivors or not. Once hired, I usually advise new employees to plan for a period of uncertainty by establishing expectations with their supervisor right up front. This is easily done by asking what they would like you to accomplish in the first weeks on the job and how they would like to interact with you. Also ask for time on the calendars of any team members. Find out how their role fits into yours, and how you can best work together. Do the same with any subordinates, so that you can learn from them what works and what doesn't work in leading them. This will make your first few months on the job much more productive.

As for the possibility of time off for possible future surgery and/or a return of cancer. That is something that you cannot predict now and most likely would change even if you did predict it a certain way. Recovery from cancer is such an individual thing. As a survivor myself, I  understand. I can say, however, that what I thought may be true of my future turned out completly different than I expected. It did take me a bit of time to get back into the swing of full time work. But, I lived by the mantra, "Fake it 'til you make it."  My post cancer career moves were some of the most exciting I could ever imagine..all because, as someone said, "I felt the fear and did it anyway."

As for how to secure your benefits and how you gracefully and legally manage to resign, here are a few thoughts for you to consider.

Benefits and levels of vacation can generally be part of a negotiation package once you receive the offer. You can generally determine a firm's benefit package by asking a recruiter to fill you in, or if you don't want to raise the issue yet due to your decision not to disclose your concerns, check out the firm on Glassdoor.com and Salary.com. You can learn a suprising amount on those two sites to give you a sense of what may be possible. It is also legitimate to negotiate the same or better vacation or PTO time as you had in a prior role. Most companies will negotiate this category of compensation, especially in a tight candidate market like today. As for future disability, that will come with an insurance package in many firms. Again, something to negotiate if needed. I would caution against asking for time off so far ahead of an unknown surgery, though. By the time that eventuality is upon you, you will know your supervisor, company cuture and coworkers much better. It may not be an issue at all.

Now, how do you gracefully bow out of a ten year tenure with one company? You ask for time with your supervisor, thank them for all that the company gave you in terms of opportunity and how much you appreciated working there. Then, you share your great news. You have been offered a chance for advancement, a step up in salary, and more room to grow. Give ample notice, if you have been working on any projects for them. Be gracious and say how working with the current firm made this move in your career to your dream job possible, and that you would love to stay in touch because you value the relationships you forged there. Then, you follow company protocols for moving on in a timely fashion.My guess is you will be pleasantly surprised at how happy your fellow co-workers are for you, and how many will  wish you well.

This is a great opportunity if you are ready to embrace it. Once you get the offer, the decision is all up to you. My belief is you can be ready and you can excel.

Wishing you the very best!

Kathy Flora, Career Coach