Hi Anna,

Thanks for reaching out! Also, congratulations on being offered a 100% full tuition scholarship! That's wonderful news and something you should be proud of. I'm going to pass this question along to one of our career coaches, but quickly just wanted to address a few of your concerns.

It's not uncommon to start a job and find that it's not what we expect it to be. It's not always a matter of being deceived, but sometimes management, policies, etc can really alter the environment and make it so you might not want to continue working there. And that's ok! Like you said yourself, you don't necessarily owe them anything and maybe they're in such desperate need because of the workplace culture they've established with their outdated policies and their unwillingnesss to provide you accommodations. With all that said, if you are concerned about a gap in your resume and don't want to take the time off until you start school, then you can certainly continue working there until you start school. You said you were 'shady'. I would beg to disagree! You said you were unexpectedly admitted and offered the scholarship. So when you were hired, you told them what you knew then. Things can always change and you can't always tell the future. The circumstance might be different if you loved this job, but you don't, you said you are miserable and that should be taken into account as you make decisions for your future.

Ultimately I would just recommend you cut yourself a bit of slack! You have a wonderful opportunity in front of you that could help propel your career forward in a way this job cannot. They may not be happy but you're not pulling a fast one on them. I'll let the career coach speak to the issue of a future negative reference, but overall, you've got some positive opportunities coming your way and you don't have to feel guilty about those accomplishments!

Warm regards,
Nicole Jarvis, LMSW

Assistant Director of Programs

Cancer and Careers

Dear Anna,

I must say that I agree with everything Nicole said to you a hundred-fold! Let me break down your questions so that I ensure that I am answering everything you have asked.

There is not an action you took that is of ill intent or duplicitious. We have all taken jobs that weren't ideal because we needed money, benefits, experience, and many other reasons. You needed money and health insurance and hoped that it would be a job you enjoyed. If this is still the case which I imagine it is, you many not have the luxury of quitting before you start school. However, what does concern me is that you are miserable, anxious, and guilt-ridden and as a career coach, I am not thrilled about your "toughing" it out for another six months. So unless you can find a way to manage these emotions and feelings, I am not sure it's a good idea to stay in this job. 

To your point, you do not owe your employer any explanation about why you are quitting when you choose to do so. Whenever this is, I would hope that you will discuss their outdated policies and negative attitude in your exit interview. It doesn't sound as if they are unhappy with your performance per se but more that you are rocking the boat. Typically organizations limit the information they share in a reference for fear of litigation anyway. Whether you are there three months or nine months, I think you should still list them as a reference. No doubt you also have many very good references from your career.

Worrying about gaps is not benefical either. So many people have gaps now as we enter the third year of a pandemic. This just isn't a burning issue for organizations anymore. 

And finally on a positive note, huge congratulations on being accepted to multiple graduate programs! This is a wondeful testimonial to you, your credentials, and your experience. Please don't let this one unfortunate work experience steal the thunder from an amazing next chapter. Don't let your fear of things that could happen such as a potentially bad reference or a gap on your resume prevent you from making the right decisions for you and your career. 

Thank you for the work you do to help people.

Sincerely,

Julie

Thank you both for the feedback. Unfortunately, this situation spiraled out of control and I'm now in a hostile, toxic reference situation. I ended up decided to resign and in an attempt NOT to burn bridges I put all the blame on myself and not being able to emotionally handle the job (telling people they had cancer all day every day). Well, it quickly spiraled out of control when she begged me to stay longer and I offered to stay but with less hours (so that I could go to my doctor's appts and therapy that I have missed since starting). I also told her that before I decided to quit I had asked for disability accommodations but would cancel them given the situation. I only gave her this heads up so she wouldn't be blindsided if they notified her before my rescinding my request went through. Feeling that I was manipulating her, she sent an extremely threatening email, including threats like "If you fail your 3 days commitment, I will take action to relieve you of your job responsibilities earlier". Essentially saying if I tried to get my legally protected ADA accommodations she would fire me. Well, my dumb self on my call with my HR rep about why I was leaving told her about this and it's turned into her legally having to open a case as that is me feeling discriminated/intimidated/threatened due to having a disability. I don't know what to do. As a nurse, even if I leave this off my resume, it'll be seen in my background check. She caNNOT be called as a reference. Help! I shouldn't have stood up for myself, but I was deeply concerned given that this is a CANCER CENTER and what if someone else came to work here with a more severe disability?!