Hi Delia,

Thanks for writing to us.  Challenges managing your treatment side effects and workload are ones we hear often from our community.  They are understandably stressful and exhausting, especially when you have a fast-paced job that requires longer hours. Although each person’s work situation and treatment demands are different, please know you aren’t alone in needing to figuring out ways to advocate for yourself and manage this. And, you certainly aren’t alone in being more comfortable advising others than figuring out your own best path forward! However, you’ve actually identified approaches that we would have recommend you think about: modifying your schedule as a reasonable accommodation under the ADA (or a similar state law) or using the FMLA to either create that more flexible schedule or to give you a chunk of time to focus on healing. It is also important to remember if you try one it doesn’t mean you couldn’t try the others. It isn’t a onetime only consideration. I would encourage you to listen to your gut, if you what you want to be doing is working but you need it to work a little better then don’t focus on your worry around the stigma of working from home—there is data out there you can look at that shows you just how many people are now doing that for a myriad of reasons, if you set it up well it can be a great way to conserve some energy and often people find they are more productive. If the stigma is around the idea that someone working from home is trying to extend a weekend or kick back and do less, propose Wednesdays which will help show that it is about replenishment of your energy stores. You didn’t mention if time of day has an impact on how you feel or what your commute is like but another thing to think about is would a modification to the timing of you work day have a positive impact or help you avoid a draining commute? It wouldn’t mean working less hours overall just distributing them differently. Other things to consider are: is there an environmental factor at work that could be changed to improve your circumstance, or is there technology that would help? Are you doing a whole lot of things that are outside of your job description—most of us pick up all kinds of extra projects and tasks (often because we are a team player and volunteering for it)—that are contributing to how much time you need to spend at work? Could those be delegated?

I’ve reached out to one of our career coaches to offer some additional insights, but in the meantime, the following resources might be of interest:

• Workplace Transitions for People Touched by Cancer: www.workplacetransitions.org (an eToolkit for managers)


• Managing Your Treatment Side Effects: http://www.cancerandcareers.org/en/at-work/where-to-start/managing-treatment-side-effects/work-and-your-treatment
  


• Setting Professional Boundaries: http://www.cancerandcareers.org/en/at-work/back-to-work-after-cancer/setting-professional-boundaries
  


• Working Through Treatment Webinar: http://www.cancerandcareers.org/en/community/videos/bwc/2016-webinar-treatment
  

Your passion for your work and your job are clear in your post so I would hate for you to not try everything you can to make it work. That said, you have a highly desirable skillset and there are all kinds of companies and organizations you could consider bringing your talents to that might not be as demanding. If it comes to that, CAC has a wide array of programs and services around job search.

I hope that this is helpful. Please reach out to us at cancerandcareers@cew.org or 646-929-8032 if you have any additional questions.

Best,
Rebecca

Rebecca V. Nellis, MPP
Executive Director
Cancer and Careers

Good Morning,Delia,

Rebecca has shared a lot of wise counsel with you in her post above.  As a survivor with HR in my background and as a career coach, I agree with all of it.   I, too, worked throughout treatment and recovery, and know how grueling travel with the job and those long hours and commuting can be.  

If I were to add anything at all to Rebecca's recommendations, I think that the most important thing for you right now is to honor how you are feeling, and to take care of your physical and emotional well-being as you go through the transition from treatment to renewed health.  It is obvious that you gain a great deal of self-satisfaction and sense of identity from your work.   How fortunate that you have found a career field that you love! 

You also mentioned several times, though, how you have very high expectations of yourself and are hard on yourself when you don't perform up to those high standards.  It sounds like you are experiencing quite a shift in your thinking about the priority of your work vs. your stamina and energy.  Do listen to your intuition about your need for rest and regeneration.  I applaud Rebecca's solutions for accommodations, especially that of teleworking if it is an option for you.   You would be surprised how many of us have worked in that mode for years and years with no stigma at all.  As long as you make an effort to be at important meetings and produce what is expected of you by those for whom you work, it can be a very helpful solution, not just as you heal, but for life balance going forward.

As you sort out the emotions and reactions you are having to this challenging interlude in your life, try to apply to your own situation what you know and counsel for others.   Kindness to yourself, setting boundaries on what you can and cannot yet do, and perhaps even a shift in what you want to do going forward are all essential parts of your healing.  And the support of your spouse, of family and of friends is critical to the new life balance you will achieve.

Give yourself time, give yourself rest, give yourself grace to heal, Delia.   Work will always be there...in one form or another.  But the insights of this time of renewal and reintegrating what you have learned and are learning about yourself and your place in the world post-cancer may only be available to you as you give them and your spirit space and time to breathe.

I am pulling for you, my sister in survival.  I know you will figure this out.

Warmly, 

Kathy Flora, Cancerandcareers Career Coach